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I just reread my post from last week, and realized that I didn’t really tell
you anything about myself, since I started going on and on about how the
cosmos really works. So let’s do that now, but you still don’t have to read
it. I was born in central Kansas, and moved around a lot in my youth. I
suppose I moved around a lot as an adult too. I was a quiet kid, and people
hated that about me. Have you ever had to deal with someone yelling in your
ear incessantly? It’s like that, except I don’t make any noise, and I guess
some people perceive that as just as irritating? My incessant silence: it
doesn’t hurt your ears, but it hurts your heart, because you have an
incessant need for attention, and if you’re around someone who doesn’t give
it to you, it feels like dying. I spent many years pretending to be a
regular person, and many years afterwards unraveling most of that so that I
could become my true self. Then I started to develop my idea of what my best
self would be, and tried to work towards that.
Here are a few random facts about me. I’m left-handed. I once knew a guy who
was legit mad at me for wearing my watch on my right wrist. I may be
left-handed because I was born with an extra finger on my right hand, which
jacked up the joints. All of my fingers are crooked, and my hands hurt
literally all the time, especially when I use them, which is why it’s so
great that I’m a writer, because it doesn’t require the use of hands. I like
baby rhinos, and hate pandas. On principle—but not in practical terms—I
don’t believe in war, national borders, money, poverty, the inherent value
of work, or religion. I think sex work should be legal, and recreational
drugs should be illegal. I would rather lose a competition than win it,
because it will always be more important to other people, and I don’t want
them to feel bad.
Here are a few random facts about you: if you’re a smoker, you’re an idiot,
and a bad person. It doesn’t matter what you’ve accomplished, or what your
IQ is. Only a total moron would poison themselves on purpose, and only an
asshole would do it in a way that potentially causes harm to others. No
matter how you die, as long as it’s not an accident or something, the smoke
will either cause your death, or exacerbate it. It will never help you, nor
remain neutral. There’s no logical reason for it. Some people like you, and
some don’t. No one is hated by all. The human body is beautiful, and you
shouldn’t be afraid of it. The toilet paper goes over the top, ‘cause
gravity. Some of your food contains bug parts. It’s fine.
Here’s some random advice. Find your strength in school, and focus on that.
Work half as hard at the things you struggle with. You’re never gonna be as
good at them as you are with your best subject, and normal people don’t need
to be good at everything to succeed. If you struggle with a subject for
years on end, while doing fine in others, that’s your worst subject, and
it’s never going to change. Smart people don’t suddenly become that way in
adulthood after being unintelligent before. Some jobs require you to be
committed and driven. Most of them, however, come with bosses that aren’t
paying enough attention to you to reward good behavior. Your number one job
in life is to find happiness, not build profit for your company. Never
forget that every company needs you more than you need it. You could survive
naked in the woods with nothing but your wits. Without labor and customers,
a company doesn’t exist. Life is all that matters.
Shower before bed, so your bed is clean, and you wake up clean. Wash your
hands. Clean everything else too. Let your children get dirty to build up
their immune system.
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