Showing posts with label laughter. Show all posts
Showing posts with label laughter. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 30, 2025

Microstory 2398: Vacuus, May 13, 2182

Generated by Google VideoFX text-to-video AI software, powered by Veo 2
Dear Pascal,

Thank you for your letter. I have shared this development with Velia, but we’re not telling anyone else, at least not for now. We were so excited when the researchers told us that the Valkyries were moving on, and we would suffer under their harsh rule no longer. It never occurred to us that Condor wouldn’t be there when we got to the other side of the unfortunate blackout. We talked about him often, wondering what became of him with his new job, and what fun new people he would have met over the last two years. I can’t believe he’s gone, and I’m frustrated at how unfair it is that we were separated from each other for so long. We finally reconnected, only to be ripped away once more, like some cruel cosmic joke. I can’t imagine what it’s like for you. You got to know him fully. You watched him grow up. You’ve seen his laugh. He sent a few photos of himself to me and Velia, and one video to Velia. He wasn’t really much of a smiler, but we don’t have very many examples, do we? I sure would have liked to see that face again. Since we can’t tell him, Velia wants me to let you know that she waited for him. She knew she would never get the chance to meet him in person, but still, she hasn’t met anyone else. She hasn’t tried, and she hasn’t let it happen. But...I think it probably needs to happen now. Condor wouldn’t want her pining for someone who can’t even write to her from across the void, would he? No, I knew him well enough to know that. Anyway, I’ll let you go. There’s nothing to say about the blackout. Most of our lives didn’t change on a day-to-day basis. For the most part, it has no effect on our internal communications. My job is a bit different, but as the saying goes, it’s nothing to write home about. I’m still doing what I’ve been doing forever. Maybe that’s how I could honor Condor in my way, by doing something brave, and making a change in my life. I’ll think about it. Thanks again for replying. The anticipation was making me sick to my stomach. At least now I know the truth.

Your loving daughter,

Corinthia

Friday, November 24, 2023

Microstory 2025: Mississippi

After working at the Auxiliary Support Branch shelter for hurricane Katrina survivors for three weeks, my papa was required to take a day off. He and the other volunteers would usually only get five or six hours of sleep every night, and the people in charge were worried about it becoming unsafe. He had made some friends there, but they had already taken their required time off. He was part of a group of holdouts, which means he resisted doing this, but the bosses weren’t going to allow him to stay any longer. He got into a car with four other people who decided to drive along the coast. They couldn’t think of anything better to do. The hurricane had destroyed so much, companies weren’t showing movies, or doing county fairs, or anything like that. Driving was the only activity. They ended up driving so much that they crossed into two other states. The first stop they made was in Mississippi, where they had lunch outside. He couldn’t remember where they ate, but I remember him telling me that he thought he had a burrito sandwich, which I guess would be a little burrito between two slices of bread? He laughed when he told me this story, like maybe he just made that part up. Once they were done, they were going to just drive back to drive back to Slidell, Louisiana, but they decided to keep going. It was kind of cool that he got to see Alabama. Remember that he was born there, but his family lived in Montana at the time, so he didn’t have any real memories of it. They saw a lot of destruction during this part of the trip; more than they had in the shelter, and it really saddened them. It does sound very sad.

Wednesday, January 4, 2023

The Advancement of Mateo Matic: November 1, 2398

Kivi drops her bag on the bench, and opens her locker. She starts to undress. Paula Strand walks in to start doing the same, and gives her a bit of the stink eye. There is a hierarchy within the ranks of a tactical team. When Paula first started, she was at the bottom, and when her direct superior was promoted to the position of Lieutenant, she too moved up to become the Engineer. But even though Kivi is the new guy around here, she now ranks higher, because she officially entered the team as the Spotter. Hurst actually took a demotion when he decided to replace Paula as Technician, but he doesn’t seem to have any problem with that. It’s a special skill set, so it all works differently than what you might find in a military setting, where a rank determines one’s leadership level and pay grade, with specializations being a separate category. Here it’s arbitrary, really, that a Spotter ranks higher than an Engineer. Paula is taking it personally.
“So, you’re back. How long will you be gracing us with your presence this time?”
“I’m here indefinitely,” Kivi answers.
Paula scoffs. “I’ll believe it when I see it.”
“I’m sure you’ll retire before me, so you won’t be seeing it.”
Paula scowls now. “If we’re still working on the same team as my retirement approaches, promise to shoot me in the head.”
“That’s not my job. All I would be able to do is help Corolla shoot you.”
Paula tries to hold back her laughter, but she can’t help it. She knows that Kivi didn’t join the team to throw her weight around. Beyond the Leader and Lieutenant, no one generally gives commands. It really only happens in an emergency situation, when the two leaders aren’t around, and somebody has to make a decision. It makes it easier and safer to always know who that person will be without any argument. Paula needs to learn how to be an engineer, and Kivi needs to learn how to spot.
“Look, this is all new to me, but I’m committed now. I don’t wanna be anywhere but here. There’s some bad people out there, and some missing people too, and I think our new directive can do some real good in this world. Don’t you agree?”
Paula sighs. “I do. It is nice to know that we have a clear goal in mind. One of the most frustrating things about being on a tack team is you never know why you’re being sent off on missions. Now we know what we’re trying to accomplish, and I hope you know that I do appreciate that you bring that to our table in a way that no one else can.”
Kivi tugs on her shirt, and slams her locker shut. “I appreciate you saying that,” she says with a smile. She turns to head for the stall before the morning briefing, but that smile turns quickly into a frown. She’s struggling with this whole thing—not the decision—but the baggage, and the lack of honesty, she comes into every government room with. This seems right. This feels right. This must be where she belongs. But when she was born a few months ago, this job would not have been on her list of future pursuits, so it feels strange at the same time. She may be experiencing impostor syndrome. Her apparent psychic abilities give her the edge that she will need to be a great Spotter, but her lack of true experience—in anything—might sow doubt in her heart every day, and that could become debilitating.
Tactician Hartwin Seegers comes into the locker room, a hand over his eyes. “The briefing is starting early. There’s been an attack. This is an all-hands-on-deck situation.”

Monday, January 10, 2022

Microstory 1796: Rounded

I love round numbers. Truthfully, I probably only held out this long so I could reach my hundredth year. Tomorrow is my birthday, and when that clock strikes zero, I plan to die. Where I live, the new year begins in the middle of the day, so my family is here to celebrate with me. They didn’t have to do that for me, squeeze into my nursing home room. I’m sure the younger ones would rather be at a party, and the older ones are too exhausted to spend this much time out of the house. I appreciate it, but I worry about how awkward it’s going to be when I pass. Only my youngest grandson knows what’s going to happen. He’s only six, but he’s so smart. He doesn’t think I’ll be able to pull it off, so I bet him a hundred dollars. He pointed out that he won’t be able to pay me if I end up being right, but it wouldn’t matter anyway. I don’t need money where I’m going, and I’m going soon, whether it’s at exactly 0:00, or not. He’s going to get a hundred bucks out of this, and it will teach him to focus his attention on safe bets. That’s the kind of lesson I’ve always tried to teach my kids. You don’t have to worry about what’s going to happen in the future if you rig it in your favor. Don’t play it safe, or you won’t get anywhere, but have an ace up your sleeve at all times. Don’t let others stack the deck against you. I’ve been unresponsive for a few hours now, but what my family doesn’t know is that I can still hear everything they’re saying. They’re talking about me, of course, and not even watching the clock. The elders are sharing stories with the youngsters. Man, I had a fun life, and I die here with no regrets. My son is talking about how I taught him how to get the job he wanted by basically not taking no for an answer. He snorts as he laughs. That’s not how it works anymore. Employers don’t like pushy people. Anyway, it worked for him in the 1960s, and he’s where he is now because of it.

They don’t notice when I pass at precisely when I meant to. My grandson positioned himself next to my vitals machine. I told you he was smart. So alarms don’t go off, he sneakily switches the little device on my finger to his own. It just keeps measuring, thinking that he’s me. He places his finger against my neck, waiting for a pulse that never comes. Still he tells no one. He lets them tell their stories, blissfully unaware that I’m gone. His parents think it’s so sweet that he’s holding my hand, but he’s really only doing it to maintain the lie. I taught him well, I tell you. They continue to tell stories for another thirty minutes until the nurse comes back in to confirm what she suspected. Grandson doesn’t apologize. He says he wanted the family to enjoy the beginning of the new year, at least for a little bit. The nurse leaves to begin the process. Meanwhile, my family decides that he’s right, or maybe they don’t want to argue about it. I was old and it was my time. There are some tears, even from those I wouldn’t have thought would produce them on this occasion, or didn’t think they would themselves. They keep going with the stories, though, trying to keep it light for the younglings. They know what’s going on, and the adults want them to feel comfortable with death, rather than being afraid of it. It takes a long time to get my body out of the room. My son’s wife is relieved. This kind of behavior would not have been tolerated on her side of the family. Death is something to be feared and ignored. She felt it was disrespectful for them to stay in here with a dead body. She tried to stay quiet, but everyone felt her disappointment. Me, I’m happy. I’m so happy that they stayed with me after I was gone. I felt so loved in the end.

Thursday, February 27, 2020

Microstory 1309: Fish Feet

Celebrity Interviewer: First of all, I am a huge fan of your work.
Seasoned Actor: Thank you very much.
Celebrity Interviewer: I mean, your performance in Severe was phenomenal; absolutely breathtaking.
Seasoned Actor: I appreciate you saying that.
Celebrity Interviewer: But that’s not why you’re here, is it?
Seasoned Actor: No.
Celebrity Interviewer: You wanna talk about your new project. It’s a pretty big departure from the kinds of things you normally do, correct?
Seasoned Actor: That’s right. It’s called Fish Feet.
Celebrity Interviewer: [Giggles]
Seasoned Actor: [Clears throat] It’s about a fish who dreams of walking on land. One day, he meets The Urchin Wizard, who grants him his wish by making him grow legs. So he goes out to explore the world with his best friend, who’s a crab. It’s delightful.
Celebrity Interviewer: That is not a word I’m seeing in the reviews.
Seasoned Actor: Well, there are millions of words, soo...
Celebrity Interviewer: A critic called it, quote, “unabashedly the worst thing I’ve ever been forced to watch in its entirety. If it weren’t my job, I would have stopped playback after ten minutes. I almost quit the paper because of this.”
Seasoned Actor: Well, that’s just one man’s opinion, from some blog site, I’m sure.
Celebrity Interviewer: It’s from the New York Times.
Seasoned Actor: Look, like you said, it’s a departure from my other work, but that doesn’t mean it’s good—I mean, not good. It doesn’t mean it’s not good.
Celebrity Interviewer: Another critique reads, “the fish’ new legs are probably about two meters in length, so he can walk alongside the humans he meets, but way too skinny. They made me really uncomfortable, and traumatized my four-year-old daughter. For some context, she laughed when that anthropomorphic peanut died. She made me turn Fish Feet off so we could watch Watership Down again. That’s why this article is a day late.”
Seasoned Actor: Okay, yes. I’ve heard these criticisms, but I’m just here to tell everybody that I loved working on this film. The director was amazing; it felt like I had known her for years. It’s supposed to be fun and silly. They made his legs ridiculous on purpose, to make kids laugh, and I think they succeeded.
Celebrity Interviewer: Apparently, there are two separate jokes about pedophilia?
Seasoned Actor: Oh my God, I’m sick of hearing about this. It’s a pun...because the fish has feet?
Celebrity Interviewer: No, no, no, yeah, we get it. That doesn’t make it okay.
Seasoned Actor: We’re done here. I thought you were going to take this seriously.
Celebrity Interviewer: I was to understand the point was that you wanted to stop having to be so serious. But I am sorry. Let’s talk about the movie. Please don’t leave.
Seasoned Actor: No, it’s done. Get this goddamn thing off my neck! We went off the record, by the way. I better not see this footage on the internet later, or your lawyers are gonna wish they had gone to medical school, where it’s less stressful.

Wednesday, February 12, 2020

Microstory 1298: The Burro and the Bust

There was a burro whose responsibility it was to carry food and other goods over the mountain to sell at the market. It was a thankless job, but he was proud of it, and always felt that things could be worse. One day, a man approached the burro’s owner, and asked her if he could borrow the burro. They wanted to transport a very important statue through town, so that all could gaze upon its magnificence during a small parade. The woman agreed, and so did the burro, even though he didn’t really understand what was going on. He was just happy to meet a new friend. The man loaded the burro with the statue, and led him down the path. When they reached the town, the crowds came out and cheered. They smiled and laughed, and some even wept a little, for the statue was a bust resembling their late leader. She was a wonderful woman, who did so much for the whole county, and they were grateful to be honoring her in this way. The burro still did not understand, though. He thought the people were cheering for him, so in response, he grunted, and he groaned, and he brayed. And the people cheered louder. They had no problem with it, because the statue didn’t have any feelings, but the burro did. There was no point in ruining his day, and the truth was that he was pretty great anyway, so it wasn’t like they were lying to him. It made everyone happy. The burro continued to walk through town with the bust, smiling with pride, and the day was better for it.

This story was inspired by, and revised from, an Aesop Fable called The Ass Carrying the Image.

Thursday, January 2, 2020

Microstory 1269: The Tortoise and the Rabbit

A rabbit was bragging to a tortoise about how much faster he could run. He kept goading the tortoise, and challenging him to a race. The tortoise was wise, and he understood his own limits, so he kept refusing. But the rabbit did not let go of this. He had already beaten all of the other animals in the forest in races, and the tortoise was the only one left. He knew he could beat him too, but he desperately wanted to prove it, so there could be no question. He also wanted to see the look on the tortoise’s face after he ran all the way to the finish line, and then ran back to mock him further. Finally, the tortoise agreed to the race, and of course, he lost. He barely made five steps before the rabbit came running back to laugh at him. Some of the animals laughed at him too for trying, even though they too had lost to the rabbit. The tortoise merely walked off, and carried about his life, not even bothering to reach the finish line. Meanwhile, the rabbit tried to move on as well, but he couldn’t. He was still stuck in the glory days. Now that he had become fastest in the forest, there was no more to accomplish, and it hadn’t really gotten him anywhere. The tortoise ended up living forty times longer than the rabbit, but even so, his life also ended in death. All the other animals who had tried to race the rabbit died as well. No one remembered them, nor cared who was the most skillful. Over the years, more rabbits raced more tortoises, and it always ended the same.

This story was inspired by, and revised from, an Aesop Fable called The Hare and the Tortoise.

Thursday, September 28, 2017

Microstory 679: Fruit of Dedication

Every year, a new group of faithful followers committing themselves to a life of service to the Light are acknowledged and inducted into the Lucidares. The Lucidares area in a special class of Lightseers, just above the common man, but still below the Highlightseers. They do not have any say in the policy of our faith, but they are leaders in their community. They are lifelines to their friends and family, providing ad hoc comfort and guidance in times of desperation. Anyone can apply to be a Lucidare, but not everyone will make it. Those that do are honored at special events around the galaxy. Certain venues would be capable of housing them all at once, but we choose not to do this. The Light is meant to shine over everything, which means concentrating it would be defeating its purpose. Plus, if all of our leadership is in one place, then all of our leadership is in the same amount of danger from some hypothetical threat. This year, the Dedication Ceremonies were meant to be held a few months from now, but the Highlightseers decided to move up the occasion in order to coincide with the Fruit of Dedication taikon prediction. As it turned out, the event with off without any problems, and nothing particularly special that happened. Food was eaten, there was dancing and laughter, and the Lucidares were sent on their Initiation Missions. Not all taikon will ultimately alter the fate of the galaxy, or the faith. Some are rather normal, and even capable of being recreated. But that’s okay. Life is a series of events full of more than defining moments.

Sunday, March 6, 2016

The Advancement of Mateo Matic: May 11, 2065

Mateo tentatively pulled himself into the lifeboat, nearly tipping it over a few times. Okay, so this was supposed to be a recreation of Life of Pi. Believe it or not, Mateo had actually read the book twice, and seen the movie three times. The visuals were just amazing in the adaptation, and so he couldn’t help but watch it every year before his first time jump. As he was sitting on the bench, back pressed against the frontmost possible, he let out a mild laugh. There was that part with the flying fish crashing into the boat like a gift for Pi and the tiger to eat. They were almost like salmon.
There was no zebra, and no orangutan. He lowered his head and tried to get a peek under the tarpaulin at the back of the boat, but he could see nothing. There still could be a hyena and tiger under there, but he was just too scared to check. He grabbed one of the oars and began to row. Pi never did that in the movie, and it was important to remember that The Rogue had an obsession with movies. Any difference in the adaptation needed to be ignored. Source material was irrelevant. But Mateo had to row, because he was on his way to find Leona. He wouldn’t be able to follow the story to the letter. Fortunately, it seemed that this tactic was not against the rules.
As he continued to row forwards—with no clue what the hell is was doing, or where he was going—he frequently looked back at the tarpaulin, just waiting for a tiger to leap out and tear him to shreds. There was a part in the movie where Pi tries to train the tiger, Richard Parker by getting it to associate isolation with seasickening waves, and calm waters with Pi and rewards. It was too early in the reenactment for that, but there was definitely some kind of moaning sound from under the tarp. Mateo adjusted the oar so that it was in position to be either a spear or a bat. But a tiger did not leap out from the darkness and attack him. Instead it was a human man. He was rubbing his head and trying to wake himself up. He stopped crawling out upon seeing Mateo. “Who are you?”
“Mateo Matic. You’re Richard Parker?”
“I am.” That was a pretty significant deviation from the film. The story told is a bit open to interpretation, and it’s possible that the animals actually represent people, but the tiger would have been representative of Pi himself, and wasn’t Mateo supposed to be Pi? No. Maybe he was the hyena.
“How did you get here?”
Richard Parker stood up but had to immediately take a rest on top of the tarp while he continued to massage his head. “The last thing I remember, I was being sent into space. My boss was testing a probe, and I was just his guinea pig.”
That was too familiar. “What year was this?”
“2036. Don’t tell me I’ve been reawoken after centuries in stasis. That’s just...too predictable.”
“Not stasis. Time travel. Let me guess, it was April? Around the twelfth? And your boss is Horace Reaver.”
“That’s exactly right. Who are you?”
“That probe was supposed to be unmanned.”
“Yeah, Reaver said there were legal problems with that, so we lied on the documentation. I didn’t feel like arguing, and honestly wasn’t worried about dying. Plus, my brother was on the moon, so I was hoping to surprise him.”
“I think I met your brother. On the moon. He was very welcoming when we found ourselves stranded there.”
“If you’re a time traveler, what happens to me?”
“Reaver said that you died, but never said how. You’re Richard.”
“Yeah, I told you that.”
“No, I mean that you’re the Richard.”
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“All three of us are time travelers. Horace Reaver knew you in an alternate timeline, along with your husband. Then he went back and changed your timeline so that you never married, but for some reason, he felt the need to hire you.”
“Nonsense.”
“Why do you think your boss was so successful? He was always defining state of the art, wasn’t he? That’s because he was from the future, and knew how to develop technology. Did you ever see him gamble? He never lost, did he? Not once. That’s because he had already seen the game.”
“But you have no proof.” He shook his head and looked for another oar. “I need to get back to Reaver so I can get this all straightened out.”
“Your boss is dead. That was ten years ago; ten days for me.”
Richard stared into Mateo’s eyes for a few moments. “I’m going to believe you for now...but only because I like what you’re saying.” He looked across the ocean all around him. “Now, where are we?”
“A fourth time traveler has put us both here to reenact Life of Pi. I think we’re going to be here for 227 days.”
Richard stared for a few moments again, and then he burst into nearly uncontrollable laughter. “My name is Richard Parker!”
Mateo laughed with him. “I never your last name, so when my enemy told me you would be here, I thought it would be an actual tiger!”
He laughed even louder upon hearing this. “Your enemy is one clever boy, I’ll give you that. What’s his name?”
“The Rogue.”
Even greater laughter. “Are we gonna die out here?”
“Not unless you’re vegetarian!”
They harmonized their laughter.

The two new friends spent a couple hundred days together on the boat, learning how to fish, but mostly just talking. Mateo spoke of his first jump, of meeting Leona, his battle with and ultimate victory over Reaver, the Rogue and The Cleanser, and everything in between. Richard’s life had been interesting, but could not quite compare. Many of the same things happened to them as they did in the movie. Sharks showed up every once in awhile. Flying fish did eventually jump into the boat and feed them. A gargantuan whale jumped up and caused them to lose a great deal of their supplies. A few things were out of order, but he was willing to give the Rogue leeway on that, especially since there was only one day and one night. It was mightily impressive how he was somehow able to manipulate the patterns of the animals. Time manipulation was one thing, but an orchestrated jellyfish lightshow was on a different level. The floating carnivorous island was glaringly absent from the tribulation. But that was to be expected since such a thing does not exist, and would take a lot more effort to generate than anything else the Rogue had done to them. And of course, since there was no tiger, the whole premise was sort of thrown out. A significant amount of the original story was about trying to survive with a dangerous wild animal. Richard, as a person, was actually rather tame and easy-going.
Time continued to pass at a far slower rate on the outside of the time bubble than it did on the inside. It probably moved a little faster than the day before, though, since Pi was written to have been on the boat less than a year. They rowed in a single direction, which was easier than it normally would be since the sun and stars were stuck in the firmament. Finally, once it was all over, they came up on some land. It was not a beautiful Mexican beach with a lush jungle behind it. No, that would be too easy. The rocky beach backed up to death and desolation. The air was packed with near blinding particulates and smelled of sulfur. A volcano simmered and steamed in the background. They didn’t bother finding a way to tie the lifeboat down. The Life of Pi tribulation had been completed. They were somewhere else. They just needed to figure out where.
A man walked up to them with a gorgeous black horse. “Excuse me, could you tell us where we are?”
“Why, you’re in the nation of Glubbdubdrib,” he answered.
Mateo and Richard just gave each other this look. “Are you the Lord of Glubbdubdrib?”
“Heavens no,” the man replied.
“Is that good or bad?” Richard asked of Mateo.
“I do not yet know.”
“He lives up there,” the man said on. “I can take you to him. I’m going that way.”
Mateo took Richard to the side and spoke in whispers. “An island or a lifeboat is one thing, but fabricating an entire country should be practically impossible, even by 2065 standards. People would know about it. Even the awesome power of the Rogue shouldn’t be enough for this. Something stranger than usual is happening here.”
“Well, what else would we do but play out your tribulation?” Richard returned.
“Good point. At least there is one thing we can count on when it comes to what happens today.”
“What’s that?” They began to follow the man who had already left without worrying about whether they were following him.
“The Rogue definitely has the ability to summon dead people through a mirror.”