Thursday, November 17, 2016

Microstory 454: Floor 32 (Part 2)

Accountant 2: Accountant 1, what are you doing?
Accountant 1: Nothing. It’s nothing.
Accountant 2: Is that a server? When did they install a server in your office? I thought that was a wardrobe? And I thought you keep it locked up because you didn’t want us to see a shrine of our boss in it, or something weird like that.
Accountant 1: Heh, funny. Let’s go with that, just the same.
Accountant 2: You’ve drilled holes into your hard drives and now you’re waving magnets over them.
Accountant 1: You can never be too careful.
Accountant 2: Is it...do you have a pictures of kids on it?
Accountant 1: What do you mean, I don’t have any...oh my god! No! Christ, Accountant 2.
Accountant 2: Then talk to me. What did you do?
Accountant 1: I dunno. Maybe nothing. I didn’t look at the data, but...I have to clear the evidence either way.
Accountant 2: Have you been stealing money?
Accountant 1: No, I’ve just been using software to make my job easier.
Accountant 2: How much easier?
Accountant 1: Well, um. I barely had to turn my computer on in the morning.
Accountant 2: What about paper reports, or  voicemail updates? You at least had to feed those in, didn’t you?
Accountant 1: My server could analyze all that. Everything I received automatically went in there. It even knows which Russian scam sites are actually run by one group of con artists.
Accountant 2: That may be, but no one trusts AI with accounting. There is too much at stake. All that money. The industry is scared to death of the next Y2K.
Accountant 1: I know, but I had it right. At least I thought I did.
Accountant 2: Is this why you always volunteered to do our work for us?
Accountant 1: I figured you deserved the downtime.
Accountant 2: You did that for us? You risked exposing your unauthorized software just so that we could play boardgames in the conference room? Why didn’t you just monetize it?
Accountant 1: I have my reasons.
Accountant 2: Stop what you’re doing right now.
Accountant 1: Why?
Accountant 2: Is the core code still intact?
Accountant 1: Well, yeah. But all the data’s been erased. I took away everything it’s learned about the world.
Accountant 2: Keep it alive. We can do something with that.

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